Tag: Timeline

The Trial and Error Round – What I Learnt from My First IVF Cycle

The Trial and Error Round – What I Learnt from My First IVF Cycle

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Almost exactly a year ago, in early September 2017, H and I were super egg-cited [sorry bad yoke šŸ˜‚] to start our first IVF cycle. After a traumatic 11 months of the miscarriage (read my letter to my angel here), the discovery that I had Ashermanā€™s Syndrome (more here), the uterus surgeries and the various hormone therapy treatments (HRTs), we were ready. Ā It had to be our turn now, surely…

I’d received the drug delivery a week earlier.Ā  Not knowing what to expect, I ordered it to work.Ā  My office used to be located in one of London’s largest shopping centres, so the delivery guy got lost.Ā  He called me (from a withheld number) in the middle of the afternoon and asked that I meet him down a dark alley outside Zara Kids.Ā  (Shady AF, if you ask me.)Ā  I rushed out of the office, not knowing what he looked like. Ā As it turned out, he wasn’t hard to spot – there was one guy standing next to a HUGE box (see picture on my Instagram).Ā  Et voilĆ , my first drug exchange was completed.

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Not TTCing… and Feeling Alive Again

Not TTCing… and Feeling Alive Again

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One of the most annoying things when youā€™re trying to conceive is other peopleā€™s [unhelpful] comments. The number one classic (which I’m sure you’ve all heard) is:Ā  ā€œyou two just need a holiday and it will happen…ā€. I often feel like responding with ā€œwell, Iā€™d prefer it if my chopped up uterus didnā€™t take a holidayā€… but, of course, instead I smile awkwardly.

After two and a half years of operations, doctorā€™s appointments, ultrasound scans, drugs up to my ears and thinking about WHEN Iā€™m going to have a baby 99.9% of the time, day and night, it turns out that what I did need was a holiday – NOT TTC, but to get away from it all.

In fact, this is the first time since the early days of our relationship that H and I actively tried not to get pregnant (and it was rather fun too šŸ˜‰). With Olaf and Sven (our two chromosomally normal embryos) chilling (literally!) in the Frozen Land (read about our PGS testing here), our consultant urged us not to get pregnant during our three months off before transfer (which should hopefully be in September). I have always thought: “wouldnā€™t it be romantic or ironic (in the Alanis Morissette sense) if I just fell pregnant naturally midst all this fertility chaos?”

Who am I kidding?Ā  H and I have never fallen pregnant naturally (the one and only time was through IUI) so this is really a romantic notion.Ā  Iā€™ve now changed my tune: I want a little test-tube baby Jesus.

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Tick Tock, Tick Tock – My TTC, Asherman’s and IVF Timeline

Tick Tock, Tick Tock – My TTC, Asherman’s and IVF Timeline

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Hello,

I started this blog back in January shortly after our second IVF-round had failed.Ā  As I’m sure you know if you’re reading this, the infertility journey has its ups and downs and some days, weeks, months are harder than others.Ā  After the second round, my heart was shattered and I couldn’t muster up the energy to write.Ā  Quite a lot has happened since January: I have had a few more tests done and completed our third IVF-round (a fresh cycle) in March and it was brutal for many reasons.Ā  That too failed and, truth be told, my heart was heavier than ever before.Ā  We are doing a second ERA now in May and a fourth egg collection round in June.Ā  I have no idea how that will go, but I’m ready to write again.Ā  So, here we go…

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In Vitro Veritas!

In Vitro Veritas!

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Hello,

Recently, Iā€™ve been trawling the World Wide Web reading fertility blogs more frequently than I have done in the past. My husband (letā€™s call him ā€œHā€) constantly reminds me to stay away from mumsnet and the like. While I agree with him that mumsnet doesn’t generally do my mental healthy any good, I just can’t seem to get enough of infertility blogs at the moment.Ā  I’m addicted to reading success stories – because they give me hope.Ā  When babies pop up right, left and centre and all you want is your own baby, it’s nice to know that you’re not the only oneĀ riding this [damn] rollercoaster, because more often than not this rollercoaster ride feels lonely.

Without sounding too religious here, I woke up this morning with an urge to write my own infertility blog.Ā  I have been writing as I go along in this process, but it is not until now that I decided to publish my thoughts.Ā  To be honest, I never thought Iā€™d write one because I did not for a second think Iā€™d have enough material to write one.Ā  Naively, I thought that by now, surely, Iā€™d be busy changing nappies, complaining about sore nipples from breastfeeding and going to Gymboree classes instead of doctor’s appointments… But here I am, a good two and a bit years into this journey and I have no baby yet and I am not currently pregnant.

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